|
|
Wednesday, February 18, 2009 @ 11:25 AM
when all we do is hurt alot i hurt you. so you hurt me back. is that how it works between you and me? so i am typing this in the comforts of qiling's room which has since been established as a refuge place for me only this time, i didn't pack and bring my suitcase along hah yet another late night with the comedic duo, lunlun and lingling. up watching slumdog millionaire, going out for supper at 3 plus am before finally sleeping at 6am? anyway big important dates are a curse to me i have been talking to friends i have not been crying but no matter how alright and accepting of things i am i will never get over the fact that even as i can see all the flaws and the hurt (that just keeps eating me up) i don't have the heart to end it. to me, it has already ended. but that's his choice to make, not mine i don't want this. obviously i thought we were better than that and no matter, this will not stop the way i feel but there comes a point where i can't linger over someone who doesn't want me there but that, he has to tell me straight i want to hear it from him straight. i want him to look me in my eyes and say it never in my life have i been ignored in such dramatic and awfully hostile fashion and like being left hanging is not my idea of a bearable week (especially with SCHOOL) can we just get this over and done with? i really wonder how i can allow someone to hurt me so much and not once did he ever attempt to apologise for that it just kills me cause things were finally good prior to this. what a mega disaster but it's ok when life gives you lemon, make lemonade :) |
