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Monday, March 30, 2009 @ 10:29 PM
white horse Say you're sorry That face of an angel comes out Just when you need it to As I pace back and forth all this time Cause I honestly believed in you Holding on, The days drag on Stupid girl I should have known, I should have known Friday, March 20, 2009 @ 6:39 PM
i think i have been watching too much tv it's been 3 whole days of being a feverish wreck now i just feel very sedated with all the medicine that i am been taking not that i am happy popping two big pills every four hours. but at least the two pills didn't give me an allergic reaction that the first small pill did. terrible timing being sick really. the thing about having a fever is that no matter how many clothes you stack on yourself, the chill never goes away because i think it comes from within. so prancing around at home with at least 3 layers of clothes just gave me the illusion that i am in Germany with Qiling. ( by the way you are very dearly missed Qiling!) i do believe that my brain is fried. my intelligence is in jeopardy unless well heat supercharges brain cells? not happening. i need to learn to use more parts of my brain to make up for this substantial loss. Wednesday, March 18, 2009 @ 2:44 PM
the yellow bird outside the window every waking moment is a struggle a struggle to go live a life that is now startling different then when night comes, it's another struggle a struggle to shake off the thoughts, the memories "too little too late?" i wish i feel that too. Tuesday, March 17, 2009 @ 1:43 PM
the only problem is you were using me Rihanna_Feat_Justin_Timberlake_--_Rehab__-_[].mp3 - Baby, baby When we first met I never felt something so strong You were like my lover And my best friend All wrapped into one With a ribbon on it And all of a sudden You went, left I didn't know how to follow It's like a shot That spun me around And now my heart left I feel so empty and hollow And I'll never give myself to another The way I gave it to you Don't even recognize The ways you hurt me Do you? It's gonna take a miracle to bring me back And you're the one to blame I guess that's what I get For wishful thinking I should've never let you enter my door Next time you wanna go on and leave I should just let you go on and do it Cause now I'm using like I bleed Damn, Ain't it crazy when you're love swept? You'll do anything for the one you love 'Cause anytime that you needed me I'd be there It's like you were my favorite drug The only problem is That you were using me In a different way that I was using you But now that I know, it's not meant to be You gotta go, I gotta ween myself off of you @ 1:06 PM
it's a good thing really i will tell you what helps. Meeting friends beyond the usual few that wasn't previously possible because well i foolishly reserved any known free time for him (not that he took any of it anyway) realising that i can pursue any thing i want without having to consider the fact that i will be leaving him behind. fully grasping the fact that it really wouldn't have worked out anyway i mean to be honest sure i had the best memories but i had lots of bad ones that just creeps back to me every time. i forgive him for every hurt but that doesn't mean i can forget it not that i want to blame him for that i understand that we both have differing opinions and that will not change anytime soon being sick and tired of having to feel like i am not good enough because i deserve better than that and i am not going to apologise for being the person i am. knowing that i was a happy person, but after everything that happened i realise that i was so very miserable and that will not do. i refuse to let anyone rob me of my happiness i do admit previously i felt very lost because i have fallen too hard, i have opened up too much i made him my everything and when he's gone what is there left for me? people will tell me to move on but i don't know how to go on. he left a gaping hole that i don't know how to replace but maybe now i can i am still upset but i think now i have learnt to have the courage to face up to reality i know i can be the person i want to be with or without him i will mend this Monday, March 16, 2009 @ 8:55 AM
it ends here i don't even remember how it all began, but maybe that does not really matter now it hurts so much i can't even begin to tell you the state i am in. i keep finding myself staring into space as if that wall is ever going to give me answers. time travel needs to be invented like now Tuesday, March 10, 2009 @ 8:41 PM
Alcoholics Anonymous? Hi my name's chiewyee and i am a terrible drinker. what an awesome drink that got me high for the very first time! merely one Flaming Lamborghini and i was giggling, stumbling my way around and talking non-stop. my blabbering topics interestingly ranged from bird nest ferns to road names. the next day, concerned friends kept questioning my sanity because i apparently did not seem to shake off the alcoholic effect. i like the warm and fuzzy feeling when i drink though :) Saturday, March 07, 2009 @ 10:58 PM
the f word they say fear is a good thing, because you actually have something to lose. Thursday, March 05, 2009 @ 8:20 PM
rock and roll baby just so people won't think i am dead. HELLO WORLD! i am not dead, i am just very busy with school work. i will update when i update. till then, i hope everyone have the time of their lives cause i feel like i am on top of the world :) contractor: what colour do you want for your room? |
